Monday, May 10, 2010

April-Fool in May

Got all of us (including myself) fooled last month in thinking I had my plan for my april BJP-piece all conjured up. I had cut up my pieces of white and blue felt, sorted out all my shades of white and blue beads.... and then suddenly realized I was not going to make a Delfts Blauw piece all together. I have made myself one promiss when starting out on this journey, and that was making each piece a journal of that particular month. The thoughts I had on the Delftware piece are still very nice, and I did celebrate Koninginnedag but still that doesn't resemble in any way what I have been through in april. So here I am again for something completely different.

As some of you may know, I started an intensive therapy programm april 19th in hope of finding a way to deal with my recurrent and very severe depression(s). A couple of days before I started, I saw the movie Alice with a dear friend, and realized that the beginning of the film - where Alice looks into the rabbithole before falling in - was exactly depicting how I felt. I was sitting an the rim of the hole and knew I had to jump in on monday. It was terrifying! Mostly because I had hardly any idea of what was going to happen after I had taken that giant leap into the unknown. Now I have shrunk and grown and shrunk again a couple of times, I ran through the forest of Underland and am still waiting for the day I will have to slay my own jabberwocky. That is when I decided to bead my own Rabbithole.

So I went to my attic and was very pleased to find some green felt and then it began: the making of the rabbithole was an adventure in itself. I first set out to make a sleeve of plain, black cotton cloth to fit the hole I had cut into the felt. It took a while untill I thought I had succeeded, but the sleeve was to long so I tore off  a just a small part. Ha! It didn't tear straight, because I had sewn the sleeve on leaving the direction of the weave in my cotton slightly slanting (if that is the correct phrase to use). Then I thought that if I would tear in the other direction I would make it straight again... All I did was shorten the sleeve on both occasions, leaving me with just a trim of black cloth around my rabbithole. Feeling very frustrated I took the whole thing off and decided to bead the thing!

You know what was so marvelous in what happenend next? As soon as I started beading around the hole, I knew I was on the right track just because I couldn't stop beading! It started to emerge under my hands as I was picking up the beads. After I had beaded a nice, wobbly edge to my rabbithole I realized I needed it filled up with "dirt". My attic was good to me in providing a good piece of brown felt and I soon was beading away again. Now the rabbitle is done for the time being at least. I had already beaded some flowers to fill up the green. Now on to the next stage... beading a lawn and finding a way to fit me in it.


  1. This happens to me just about every month. I think I know where I am beading to, only to find out the beads twisted my path and sent me in another direction. Your rabbit hole looks pretty good.

    hope you are feeling very much better.
    xx, Carol

  2. what a clever idea...i know what that rabbit looks like! yours is a very good depiction of it, too. you always come up with the most interesting and involved pieces. i can't wait to see this one finished. i hope you are feeling well. hugs to you.

  3. i didn't mean to say i know what the rabbit looks i meant to say i know what that rabbit hole looks like. hehe. got fat fingers and a wandering brain today.

  4. I am so glad that you're listening to your voice that tells you to bead a rabbit hole instead of blue delft!~! You are so very good at being present in the moment Dees. Personally, I think your hole is great (that doesn't sound so good *snicker) and I am glad it is small. I love the Alice illustration that you included in the looks so alive and vibrant. I hope that means that the rabbit hole that you've gone down is not too, Susan

  5. It may have been a frustrating beginning but you're off to a great start.

    That's an absolutely fabulous illustraion of Alice at the rabbit hole. Thanks for putting it up.


Thank you for reading my blog and joining me on my voyage into life with and without beads. I hope it brings you new thoughts and inspiration.
Love to see you back!


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